US Flag Etiquette
STANDARDS of RESPECT
The Flag Code, which formalizes and unifies the traditional ways in which we give respect to the flag, also contains specific instructions on how the flag is not to be used. They are:
The flag should never be dipped to any person or thing. It is flown upside down only as a distress signal.
The flag should not be used as a drapery, or for covering a speakers desk, draping a platform, or for any decoration in general. Bunting of blue, white and red stripes is available for these purposes. The blue stripe of the bunting should be on the top.
The flag should never be used for any advertising purpose. It should not be embroidered, printed or otherwise impressed on such articles as cushions, handkerchiefs, napkins, boxes, or anything intended to be discarded after temporary use. Advertising signs should not be attached to the staff or halyard.
The flag should not be used as part of a costume or athletic uniform, except that a flag patch may be used on the uniform of military personnel, fireman, policeman and members of patriotic organizations.
The flag should never have placed on it, or attached to it, any mark, insignia, letter, word, number, figure, or drawing of any kind.
The flag should never be used as a receptacle for receiving, holding, carrying, or delivering anything.
When the flag is lowered, no part of it should touch the ground or any other object; it should be received by waiting hands and arms. To store the flag it should be folded neatly and ceremoniously.
The flag should be cleaned and mended when necessary.
When a flag is so worn it is no longer fit to serve as a symbol of our country, it should be destroyed by burning in a dignified manner.
Note: Most American Legion Posts regularly conduct a dignified flag burning ceremony, often on Flag Day, June 14th. Many Cub Scout Packs, Boy Scout Troops, and Girl Scout Troops retire flags regularly as well. Contact your local American Legion Hall or Scout Troop to inquire about the availability of this service.
Displaying the Flag Outdoors
When the flag is displayed from a staff projecting from a window, balcony, or a building, the union should be at the peak of the staff unless the flag is at half staff.
When it is displayed from the same flagpole with another flag - of a state, community, society or Scout unit - the flag of the United States must always be at the top except that the church pennant may be flown above the flag during church services for Navy personnel when conducted by a Naval chaplain on a ship at sea.
When the flag is displayed over a street, it should be hung vertically, with the union to the north or east. If the flag is suspended over a sidewalk, the flag's union should be farthest from the building.
When flown with flags of states, communities, or societies on separate flag poles which are of the same height and in a straight line, the flag of the United States is always placed in the position of honor - to its own right...The other flags may be smaller but none may be larger...No other flag ever should be placed above it...The flag of the United States is always the first flag raised and the last to be lowered.
When flown with the national banner of other countries, each flag must be displayed from a separate pole of the same height. Each flag should be the same size. They should be raised and lowered simultaneously. The flag of one nation may not be displayed above that of another nation.
Raising and Lowering the Flag
The flag should be raised briskly and lowered slowly and ceremoniously. Ordinarily it should be displayed only between sunrise and sunset. It should be illuminated if displayed at night.The flag of the United States of America is saluted as it is hoisted and lowered. The salute is held until the flag is unsnapped from the halyard or through the last note of music, whichever is the longest.
Displaying the Flag Indoors
When on display, the flag is accorded the place of honor, always positioned to its own right. Place it to the right of the speaker or staging area or sanctuary. Other flags should be to the left.
The flag of the United States of America should be at the center and at the highest point of the group when a number of flags of states, localities, or societies are grouped for display.
When one flag is used with the flag of the United States of America and the staffs are crossed, the flag of the United States is placed on its own right with its staff in front of the other flag.
When displaying the flag against a wall, vertically or horizontally, the flag's union (stars) should be at the top, to the flag's own right, and to the observer's left.
Parading and Saluting the Flag
When carried in a procession, the flag should be to the right of the marchers. When other flags are carried, the flag of the United States may be centered in front of the others or carried to their right. When the flag passes in a procession, or when it is hoisted or lowered, all should face the flag and salute.
The Salute
To salute, all persons come to attention. Those in uniform give the appropriate formal salute. Citizens not in uniform salute by placing their right hand over the heart and men with head cover should remove it and hold it to left shoulder, hand over the heart. Members of organizations in formation salute upon command of the person in charge.
The Pledge of Allegiance and National Anthem
The pledge of allegiance should be rendered by standing at attention, facing the flag, and saluting.When the national anthem is played or sung, citizens should stand at attention and salute at the first note and hold the salute through the last note. The salute is directed to the flag, if displayed, otherwise to the music.
The Flag in Mourning
To place the flag at half staff, hoist it to the peak for an instant and lower it to a position half way between the top and bottom of the staff. The flag is to be raised again to the peak for a moment before it is lowered. On Memorial Day the flag is displayed at half staff until noon and at full staff from noon to sunset.
The flag is to be flown at half staff in mourning for designated, principal government leaders and upon presidential or gubernatorial order.
When used to cover a casket, the flag should be placed with the union at the head and over the left shoulder. It should not be lowered into the grave.
Friday, March 21, 2008
Monday, March 17, 2008
MannersMatterUSA.com
Manners and Etiquette training kits for children
Child Care Providers, Educators and Parents; Teach basic manners to children!Create a profit and provide a value added service!!
Our goal is to provide an effective training curriculum for teaching children, ages 3-12 manners, respect and communication skills in order to instill leadership and social confidence in their daily lives.
Recent research shows that good manners and social skills are very important to a child’s future success. Child Care Professionals agree that learning the proper way to conduct oneself with respect and courtesy for others should begin as early as 3 years old. Once children learn basic manners, parents and teachers can build on this understanding to teach children how to behave in a range of social settings, how to manage conflict, and how to show kindness and consideration for others.
Our time proven programs offer parents, educators, and caregivers an extensive no nonsense course curriculum that provides a Social Foundation built on Manners, Respect, First Impressions, Communication Skills and Confidence for children ages 3-12. As children grow and progress through the lessons it is easy to see that Manners Matter in the USA, and all it takes is a few minutes to make a difference.
Free Lesson
Manners and Etiquette training kits for children
Child Care Providers, Educators and Parents; Teach basic manners to children!Create a profit and provide a value added service!!
Our goal is to provide an effective training curriculum for teaching children, ages 3-12 manners, respect and communication skills in order to instill leadership and social confidence in their daily lives.
Recent research shows that good manners and social skills are very important to a child’s future success. Child Care Professionals agree that learning the proper way to conduct oneself with respect and courtesy for others should begin as early as 3 years old. Once children learn basic manners, parents and teachers can build on this understanding to teach children how to behave in a range of social settings, how to manage conflict, and how to show kindness and consideration for others.
Our time proven programs offer parents, educators, and caregivers an extensive no nonsense course curriculum that provides a Social Foundation built on Manners, Respect, First Impressions, Communication Skills and Confidence for children ages 3-12. As children grow and progress through the lessons it is easy to see that Manners Matter in the USA, and all it takes is a few minutes to make a difference.
Free Lesson
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Etiquette Definition
Etiquette, one aspect of decorum, is a code that governs the expectations of social behavior, according to the contemporary conventional norm within a society, social class, or group. Usually unwritten, it may be codified in written form. Etiquette usually reflects formulas of conduct in which society or tradition have invested. An etiquette may reflect an underlying ethical code, or in may grow more as a fashion, as in eighteenth century Britain where apparently pointless acts like the manner in which a tea cup was held became important as indicators of upper class status. Like "culture", it is a word that has gradually grown plural, especially in a multi-ethnic society with many clashing expectations. Thus, it is now possible to refer to "an etiquette" or "a culture", realizing that these may not be universal. In Britain, though, the word etiquette has its roots in the eighteenth century, becoming a universal force in the nineteenth century to the extent that it has been described as the one word that aptly describes life during the reign of Queen Victoria
1 Norms and effects of etiquette
2 Manners
3 Cultural differences
4 Western business etiquette
5 See also
6 References
7 Further reading
8 External links
Etiquette and language
Acrolect
Basilect
Honorific
Netiquette
Political correctness
Prescription and description
Profanity
Semantics
Slang
Slang dictionary
Standard language
Style of address
T-V distinction
Etiquette and society
Aliénor de Poitiers early documentor of French etiquette
Concert etiquette
Debrett's
Diplomacy
Faux pas, Faux pas derived from Chinese pronunciation
Intercultural competence
Levée, the English version of Louis XIV's morning rising etiquette (lever) at Versailles.
Military courtesy
Office etiquette
Order of precedence
Protocol
Refine, Psychology And Social Class
Social Norms
Table manners
Worldwide etiquette
Zigzag method
Worldwide Etiquette
Worldwide
Africa
Asia
Australia and New Zealand
Canada and the United States
Europe
Latin America
Middle East
Etiquette, one aspect of decorum, is a code that governs the expectations of social behavior, according to the contemporary conventional norm within a society, social class, or group. Usually unwritten, it may be codified in written form. Etiquette usually reflects formulas of conduct in which society or tradition have invested. An etiquette may reflect an underlying ethical code, or in may grow more as a fashion, as in eighteenth century Britain where apparently pointless acts like the manner in which a tea cup was held became important as indicators of upper class status. Like "culture", it is a word that has gradually grown plural, especially in a multi-ethnic society with many clashing expectations. Thus, it is now possible to refer to "an etiquette" or "a culture", realizing that these may not be universal. In Britain, though, the word etiquette has its roots in the eighteenth century, becoming a universal force in the nineteenth century to the extent that it has been described as the one word that aptly describes life during the reign of Queen Victoria
1 Norms and effects of etiquette
2 Manners
3 Cultural differences
4 Western business etiquette
5 See also
6 References
7 Further reading
8 External links
Etiquette and language
Acrolect
Basilect
Honorific
Netiquette
Political correctness
Prescription and description
Profanity
Semantics
Slang
Slang dictionary
Standard language
Style of address
T-V distinction
Etiquette and society
Aliénor de Poitiers early documentor of French etiquette
Concert etiquette
Debrett's
Diplomacy
Faux pas, Faux pas derived from Chinese pronunciation
Intercultural competence
Levée, the English version of Louis XIV's morning rising etiquette (lever) at Versailles.
Military courtesy
Office etiquette
Order of precedence
Protocol
Refine, Psychology And Social Class
Social Norms
Table manners
Worldwide etiquette
Zigzag method
Worldwide Etiquette
Worldwide
Africa
Asia
Australia and New Zealand
Canada and the United States
Europe
Latin America
Middle East
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Thomas Edison’s Advice on Success
1. “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” Do not give up!
2. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Failure is not an option!
3. “The value of an idea lies in the using of it.” Produce!
4. “Being busy does not always mean real work. The object of all work is production or accomplishment and to either of these ends there must be forethought, system, planning, intelligence, and honest purpose, as well as perspiration. Seeming to do is not doing.”
5. “Genius is 1% one percent inspiration and 99% ninety-nine percent perspiration.”
***One Big Mistake a Whole Lot of People Make
Basically, misjudging how long time it will take to get the desired results.
1. “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” Do not give up!
2. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Failure is not an option!
3. “The value of an idea lies in the using of it.” Produce!
4. “Being busy does not always mean real work. The object of all work is production or accomplishment and to either of these ends there must be forethought, system, planning, intelligence, and honest purpose, as well as perspiration. Seeming to do is not doing.”
5. “Genius is 1% one percent inspiration and 99% ninety-nine percent perspiration.”
***One Big Mistake a Whole Lot of People Make
Basically, misjudging how long time it will take to get the desired results.
Friday, February 22, 2008
Etiquette for MEN
Technology begets rudeness
But etiquette author suggests maybe we're waking up to our own boorish selves
By BEVERLY KEELCelebrity Columnist Tennessean
The technology that makes some of our daily tasks easier also provides more opportunities for rudeness, according to a Nashville etiquette author.
"We've got technology that allows us to be rude, and we don't even realize how rude we're being," said John Bridges, author of numerous books on manners, including How To Be a Gentleman, which has been published in about a dozen languages. "I hope that people wouldn't go around being intentionally rude no matter what, but I think that we don't understand how rude we are being when we send off a really flip e-mail. Just don't send an angry e-mail; please think twice before you hit 'send' if you are not in a good mood.
"There seems to be an appetite for such advice, perhaps because Bridges presents it in such a non-threatening way, said Pamela Clements, publisher of Thomas Nelson General Interest and Lifestyle. "His writing style and voice are funny, and it's like a more urbane friend who is giving you the secret handshake. It's almost like bringing you into the club: 'Here are the things you need to know,' and people love it."
Concerned about behavior
Bridges, who served as Nashville's director of cultural affairs for eight years, released How To Be a Gentleman in 1998, and it has sold about 250,000 copies. Bridges and collaborator Bryan Curtis also have written books in the Gentlemanners series — including A Gentleman Gets Dressed Up, A Gentleman Entertains and Toasts and Tributes — that also includes lady-themed contributions from writers Kay West, Candace Simpson-Giles and Sheryl Shade. The series, which is approaching sales of 1.5 million, is available in Joseph A. Banks Clothier and Crane's Stationery stores. Brooks Brothers and Dillard's have released the books with custom covers.
"People really are concerned about their behavior more than you think they are," he said. "We've gone through a couple of generations, or at least one long generation, where all of this discussion and a lot of the training in terms of conduct and etiquette and just general courtesy just went away. Now people are beginning to realize, 'I don't know this and I want to know it.' They get worried about what they are going to do when they go out to a restaurant, either on a social occasion or for a business lunch or dinner.
"Bridges recently finished writing the second edition of How To Be a Gentleman, which will be released this spring, and he discovered he had plenty of new topics to address, including e-mail and cell phone etiquette and the fad of untucked shirts, baseball caps indoors and low-hanging jeans, as well as the changes in smoking policies and travel.
Of course, the basics remain the same, such as how to use the proper silverware or make an introduction.
Few classy models
So what is a gentleman in 2008?"
People do think that it's an outmoded thing and that you have to be Cary Grant to be a gentleman," Bridges, 57, said. "A Cary Grant is more a matter of style and savoir faire and flair. The basic rule of being a gentleman doesn't change: A gentleman is somebody who knows how to be there when he's needed and gets out of the way the rest of the time.
"It's about trying to be helpful and being considerate of others. It's not about wearing the most expensive clothes in the world. It's about making sure your clothes are neat and clean so that you don't offend somebody else. It's not about spending a bunch of money or knowing what fork to use. But it's about caring about doing the right thing."
Quite simply, a gentleman is a nice guy.
The younger generation may have difficulty determining what appropriate behavior should be because there are so many celebrities acting so badly so often. It's not that celebrities behave worse than their famous predecessors, but that now their every action is caught on tape, Bridges said. This perpetuates the notion that rudeness in acceptable.
"I am so tired of seeing the bare abdomens of 16-year-old girls and the underwear of 16-year-old boys because they're wearing their pants so low," he said. "That is simply because that's what they've seen from the celebrities on the fronts of magazines."
Despite the renewed interest in etiquette and behavior, Bridges said, society is at a disturbing time in terms of rudeness. "It won't get any better if people don't start paying attention to it. Let me make it clear: It's not a class thing; it doesn't matter what part of town you are in. It's a mind-set.
"I do know that people seem to be concerned about it. It does appear in many ways (that) people truly don't know how to behave in the simplest and most basic sorts of ways. That is very tough to change or teach. That is saying, 'This is what it means to be courteous to other people.' "
John Bridges' current pet peeve is inappropriate cell phone usage, which often feels inescapable in today's society. He said the moment a plane lands, passengers make a cell phone call, or remain on the phone after the flight attendant announces that all phones must be turned off. Recently Bridges was in a doctor's waiting room where a young woman talked on her phone for 30 minutes, despite a sign saying that all calls should be made in the hall."It's a basic lack of consideration for other people and a basic lack of self discipline," he said. He said a gentleman should not use his cell phone:
• While driving;
• In church or during a theater performance, movie or concert;
• At a table in a restaurant of any kind, from fast food to first class;
• In the waiting or examination rooms of a doctor's office;
• While standing in line in stores, the post office or where others would find themselves trapped as an unwilling witness to the conversation;
• In an elevator if others are present who aren't friends or co-workers.
Etiquette expert John Bridges said some people don't want to hear his advice on proper fashion and behavior in today's society. Here are some opinions that have generated disagreement or misunderstanding:
• A gentleman should wear an undershirt to absorb sweat. "People say, 'I don't sweat,' " he said. "Well, you don't know if you sweat or not. Years ago, when Al Gore was announcing Joe Lieberman as his running mate in Nashville, which was so hot, the next day The New York Times said, 'Clearly Mr. Lieberman had remembered to wear an undershirt and Mr. Gore had not.' People notice."
• This undershirt should be tucked into a man's under wear so that he won't reveal skin if he squats, Bridges said. "People say, I don't want to go around sticking my T-shirt into my underwear. I'm not talking about your shirt."
• A gentleman should open a door for a woman. "I cannot believe that anybody would ever walk through a door and not look behind them to see if somebody else was coming to see if they could help, whether it's a man or woman. Men say that these days women don't want men to open doors for them, which simply is not true."
• Don't wear a suit that has cuffed pants with cowboy boots. "When I have an interview with someone from Texas or Oklahoma, they say, 'What do you mean?' There are boot-cut suits."
• A gentleman tips the appropriate amount for services rendered. For instance, car valets should be tipped $2-$3, or $5 or more if they've gone to great effort to park or retrieve your car. (If you only have $1, that is better than nothing, he said. There's also nothing wrong with asking a valet to make change for a larger bill.) "People don't like to be told what the appropriate amount is," he said. "They are concerned about it, but frequently they don't want to hear the answer."
— BEVERLY KEELBooks by John Bridges on Etiquette
Technology begets rudeness
But etiquette author suggests maybe we're waking up to our own boorish selves
By BEVERLY KEELCelebrity Columnist Tennessean
The technology that makes some of our daily tasks easier also provides more opportunities for rudeness, according to a Nashville etiquette author.
"We've got technology that allows us to be rude, and we don't even realize how rude we're being," said John Bridges, author of numerous books on manners, including How To Be a Gentleman, which has been published in about a dozen languages. "I hope that people wouldn't go around being intentionally rude no matter what, but I think that we don't understand how rude we are being when we send off a really flip e-mail. Just don't send an angry e-mail; please think twice before you hit 'send' if you are not in a good mood.
"There seems to be an appetite for such advice, perhaps because Bridges presents it in such a non-threatening way, said Pamela Clements, publisher of Thomas Nelson General Interest and Lifestyle. "His writing style and voice are funny, and it's like a more urbane friend who is giving you the secret handshake. It's almost like bringing you into the club: 'Here are the things you need to know,' and people love it."
Concerned about behavior
Bridges, who served as Nashville's director of cultural affairs for eight years, released How To Be a Gentleman in 1998, and it has sold about 250,000 copies. Bridges and collaborator Bryan Curtis also have written books in the Gentlemanners series — including A Gentleman Gets Dressed Up, A Gentleman Entertains and Toasts and Tributes — that also includes lady-themed contributions from writers Kay West, Candace Simpson-Giles and Sheryl Shade. The series, which is approaching sales of 1.5 million, is available in Joseph A. Banks Clothier and Crane's Stationery stores. Brooks Brothers and Dillard's have released the books with custom covers.
"People really are concerned about their behavior more than you think they are," he said. "We've gone through a couple of generations, or at least one long generation, where all of this discussion and a lot of the training in terms of conduct and etiquette and just general courtesy just went away. Now people are beginning to realize, 'I don't know this and I want to know it.' They get worried about what they are going to do when they go out to a restaurant, either on a social occasion or for a business lunch or dinner.
"Bridges recently finished writing the second edition of How To Be a Gentleman, which will be released this spring, and he discovered he had plenty of new topics to address, including e-mail and cell phone etiquette and the fad of untucked shirts, baseball caps indoors and low-hanging jeans, as well as the changes in smoking policies and travel.
Of course, the basics remain the same, such as how to use the proper silverware or make an introduction.
Few classy models
So what is a gentleman in 2008?"
People do think that it's an outmoded thing and that you have to be Cary Grant to be a gentleman," Bridges, 57, said. "A Cary Grant is more a matter of style and savoir faire and flair. The basic rule of being a gentleman doesn't change: A gentleman is somebody who knows how to be there when he's needed and gets out of the way the rest of the time.
"It's about trying to be helpful and being considerate of others. It's not about wearing the most expensive clothes in the world. It's about making sure your clothes are neat and clean so that you don't offend somebody else. It's not about spending a bunch of money or knowing what fork to use. But it's about caring about doing the right thing."
Quite simply, a gentleman is a nice guy.
The younger generation may have difficulty determining what appropriate behavior should be because there are so many celebrities acting so badly so often. It's not that celebrities behave worse than their famous predecessors, but that now their every action is caught on tape, Bridges said. This perpetuates the notion that rudeness in acceptable.
"I am so tired of seeing the bare abdomens of 16-year-old girls and the underwear of 16-year-old boys because they're wearing their pants so low," he said. "That is simply because that's what they've seen from the celebrities on the fronts of magazines."
Despite the renewed interest in etiquette and behavior, Bridges said, society is at a disturbing time in terms of rudeness. "It won't get any better if people don't start paying attention to it. Let me make it clear: It's not a class thing; it doesn't matter what part of town you are in. It's a mind-set.
"I do know that people seem to be concerned about it. It does appear in many ways (that) people truly don't know how to behave in the simplest and most basic sorts of ways. That is very tough to change or teach. That is saying, 'This is what it means to be courteous to other people.' "
John Bridges' current pet peeve is inappropriate cell phone usage, which often feels inescapable in today's society. He said the moment a plane lands, passengers make a cell phone call, or remain on the phone after the flight attendant announces that all phones must be turned off. Recently Bridges was in a doctor's waiting room where a young woman talked on her phone for 30 minutes, despite a sign saying that all calls should be made in the hall."It's a basic lack of consideration for other people and a basic lack of self discipline," he said. He said a gentleman should not use his cell phone:
• While driving;
• In church or during a theater performance, movie or concert;
• At a table in a restaurant of any kind, from fast food to first class;
• In the waiting or examination rooms of a doctor's office;
• While standing in line in stores, the post office or where others would find themselves trapped as an unwilling witness to the conversation;
• In an elevator if others are present who aren't friends or co-workers.
Etiquette expert John Bridges said some people don't want to hear his advice on proper fashion and behavior in today's society. Here are some opinions that have generated disagreement or misunderstanding:
• A gentleman should wear an undershirt to absorb sweat. "People say, 'I don't sweat,' " he said. "Well, you don't know if you sweat or not. Years ago, when Al Gore was announcing Joe Lieberman as his running mate in Nashville, which was so hot, the next day The New York Times said, 'Clearly Mr. Lieberman had remembered to wear an undershirt and Mr. Gore had not.' People notice."
• This undershirt should be tucked into a man's under wear so that he won't reveal skin if he squats, Bridges said. "People say, I don't want to go around sticking my T-shirt into my underwear. I'm not talking about your shirt."
• A gentleman should open a door for a woman. "I cannot believe that anybody would ever walk through a door and not look behind them to see if somebody else was coming to see if they could help, whether it's a man or woman. Men say that these days women don't want men to open doors for them, which simply is not true."
• Don't wear a suit that has cuffed pants with cowboy boots. "When I have an interview with someone from Texas or Oklahoma, they say, 'What do you mean?' There are boot-cut suits."
• A gentleman tips the appropriate amount for services rendered. For instance, car valets should be tipped $2-$3, or $5 or more if they've gone to great effort to park or retrieve your car. (If you only have $1, that is better than nothing, he said. There's also nothing wrong with asking a valet to make change for a larger bill.) "People don't like to be told what the appropriate amount is," he said. "They are concerned about it, but frequently they don't want to hear the answer."
— BEVERLY KEELBooks by John Bridges on Etiquette
Setting the Table
Remember that the utensils for each course are placed in the order served, from the outside in. This will eliminate any confusion for any guest.Your formal menu may not include a fish course and/or your tableware set may not include fish forks and knives. If there is not a fish course then don't put out the fish forks and knives. In the event there is a fish course, it is perfectly acceptable to substitute what you have such that there are utensils for each course.
www.smpub.com/setatable/setatable.html
"I'm always amazed at how many people don't know how to set a table," says Roseanna Robinson, director of Home Entertaining and Dining for The Pfaltzgraff Co. "We often intimidate guests by being too formal, yet some rules do apply." The following diagram shows a full-blown table setting for a fancy dinner party. Adjust it as necessary to fit your menu. "Remember to make your guests as comfortable as you can. Don't put out utensils that won't ever be used. If your menu doesn't include anything that would be eaten with a teaspoon, don't put teaspoons on the table. If you're planning to serve coffee and dessert afterward, bring out the teaspoons then," advises Robinson.
1. Napkin
2. Salad fork
3. Dinner fork
4. Dessert fork
5. Bread-and-butter plate, with spreader
6. Dinner plate
7. Dinner knife
8. Teaspoon
9. Teaspoon
10. Soup spoon
11. Cocktail fork
12. Water glass
13. Red-wine glass
14. White-wine glass
15. Coffee cup and saucer*
For an informal meal, include the coffee cup and saucer with the table setting. Otherwise, bring them to the table with the dessert.
www.almanac.com/food/settable.php
Etiquette Everyday ~ Entertaining
Table Setting Guides
Setting a table is not as difficult as it seems. The basic rule is: Utensils are placed in the order of use, that is, from the outside in. A second rule, with only a few exceptions is: forks go to the left of the plate, and knives and spoons go to the right.
Basic Place Setting > Description and diagram
For a basic table setting, here are two great tricks to help you – or your kids – remember the order of plates and utensils:
1. Picture the word “FORKS.” The order, left to right is: F for Fork, O for Plate (the shape!), K for Knives and S for Spoons. (Okay – you have to forget the r, but you get the idea!)
2. Holding your hands in front of you, touch the tips of your thumbs to the tips of your forefinergers to make a lower case ‘b’ with your left hand and a lower case ‘d’ with your right hand. This reminds you that ‘bread and butter’ go to the left of the place setting and ‘drinks’ go on the right. Emily Post could have used that trick – she was often confused about which bread and butter belonged to her—and sometimes she used her neighbor’s! In which case, when it was called to her attention, she would say to the dismayed lady or gentleman, “Oh, I am always mixing them up. Here, please take mine!”
3. Some other things to know:
o Knife blades always face the plate
o The napkin goes to the left of the fork, or on the plate
o The bread and butter plate and knife are optional
Informal Place Setting > Description and diagram
When an informal three-course dinner is served, the typical place setting includes these utensils and dishes:
Our illustration shows how a table would be set for the following menu: Soup course Salad or first course Entrée Dessert
a. Dinner plate: This is the ‘hub of the wheel’ and is usually the first thing to be set on the table. In our illustration, the dinner plate would be placed where the napkin is, with the napkin on top of the plate.
b. Two Forks: The forks are placed to the left of the plate. The dinner fork, the larger of the two forks, is used for the main course; the smaller fork is used for a salad or appetizer. The forks are arranged according to when you need to use them, following an ‘outside-in’ order. If the small fork is needed for an appetizer or a salad served before the main course, then it is placed on the left (outside) of the dinner fork; if the salad is served after the main course, then the small fork is placed to the right (inside) of the dinner fork, next to the plate.
c. Napkin: The napkin is folded or put in a napkin ring and placed either to the left of the forks or on the center of the dinner plate. Sometimes, a folded napkin is placed under the forks.
d. Dinner knife: The dinner knife is set immediately to the right of the plate, cutting edge facing inward. (If the main course is meat, a steak knife can take the place of the dinner knife.) At an informal meal, the dinner knife may be used for all courses, but a dirty knife should never be placed on the table, placemat or tablecloth.
e. Spoons: Spoons go to the right of the knife. In our illustration, soup is being served first, so the soupspoon goes to the far (outside) right of the dinner knife; the teaspoon or dessert spoon, which will be used last, goes to the left (inside) of the soupspoon, next to the dinner knife.
f. Glasses: Drinking glasses of any kind – water, wine, juice, ice tea – are placed at the top right of the dinner plate, above the knives and spoons.
Other dishes and utensils are optional, depending on what is being served, but may include:
g. Salad plate: This is placed to the left of the forks. If salad is to be eaten with the meal, you can forgo the salad plate and serve it directly on the dinner plate. However, if the entrée contains gravy or anything runny, it is better to serve the salad on a separate plate to keep things neater.
h. Bread plate with butter knife: If used, the bread plate goes above the forks, with the butter knife placed diagonally across the edge of plate, handle on the right side and blade facing down.
i. Dessert spoon and fork: These can be placed either horizontally above the dinner plate (the spoon on top with its handle facing to the right; the fork below with its handle facing left); or beside the plate. If placed beside the plate, the fork goes on the left side, closest to the plate (because it will be the last fork used) and the spoon goes on the right side of the plate, to the right of the dinner knife and to the left of the soupspoon.
j. Coffee cup and saucer: Our illustration shows a table setting that would be common in a restaurant serving a large number of people at once, with coffee being served during the meal. The coffee cup and saucer are placed above and to the right of the knife and spoons. At home, most people serve coffee after the meal. In that case the cups and saucers are brought to the table and placed above and to the right of the knife and spoons.
Formal Place Setting > Description and diagram
The one rule for a formal table is for everything to be geometrically spaced: the centerpiece at the exact center; the place settings at equal distances; and the utensils balanced. Beyond these placements, you can vary flower arrangements and decorations as you like.
The placement of utensils is guided by the menu, the idea being that you use utensils in an “outside in” order. For the illustrated place setting here, the order of the menu is:
Appetizer: Shellfish First Course: Soup or fruit Fish Course Entrée Salad
a. Service Plate: This large plate, also called a charger, serves as an underplate for the plate holding the first course, which will be brought to the table. When the first course is cleared, the service plate remains until the plate holding the entrée is served, at which point the two plates are exchanged. The charger may serve as the underplate for several courses which precede the entrée.
b. Butter plate: The small butter plate is placed above the forks at the left of the place setting.
c. Dinner fork: The largest of the forks, also called the place fork, it is placed on the left of the plate. Other smaller forks for other courses are arranged to the left or right of the dinner fork, according to when they will be used.
d. Fish fork: If there is a fish course, this small fork is placed farthest to the left of the dinner fork because it is the first fork used.
e. Salad fork: If salad is served after the entrée, the small salad fork is placed to the right of the dinner fork, next to the plate. If the salad is to be served first, and fish second, then the forks would be arranged (left to right): salad fork, fish fork, dinner fork.
f. Dinner knife: The large dinner knife is placed to the right of the dinner plate.
g. Fish knife: The specially shaped fish knife goes to the right of the dinner knife.
h. Salad knife: (Note: there is no salad knife in the illustration.) If used, according to the above menu, it would be placed to the left of the dinner fork, next to the dinner plate. If the salad is to be served first, and fish second, then the knives would be arranged (left to right):dinner knife, fish knife, salad knife.
i. Soup spoon or fruit spoon: If soup or fruit is served as a first course, then the accompanying spoon goes to the right of the knives.
j. Oyster fork: If shellfish are to be served, the oyster fork is set to the right of the spoons. Note: It is the only fork ever placed on the right of the plate.
k. Butter knife: This small spreader is paced diagonally on top of the butter plate, handle on the right and blade down.
l. Glasses: These can number up to five and are placed so that the smaller ones are in front. The water goblet (la) is placed directly above the knives. Just to the right goes a champagne flute (lb); In front of these are placed a red (lc) and/or white (ld) wine glass and a sherry glass (le)
m. Napkin: The napkin is placed on top of the charger (if one is used) or in the space for the plate.
In general:
Knife blades are always placed with the cutting edge toward the plate.
No more than three of any implement is ever placed on the table, except when an oyster fork is used in addition to three other forks. If more than three courses are served before dessert, then the utensil for the fourth course is brought in with the food; likewise the salad fork and knife may be brought in when the salad course is served.
Dessert spoons and forks are brought in on the dessert plate just before dessert is served.
Remember that the utensils for each course are placed in the order served, from the outside in. This will eliminate any confusion for any guest.Your formal menu may not include a fish course and/or your tableware set may not include fish forks and knives. If there is not a fish course then don't put out the fish forks and knives. In the event there is a fish course, it is perfectly acceptable to substitute what you have such that there are utensils for each course.
www.smpub.com/setatable/setatable.html
"I'm always amazed at how many people don't know how to set a table," says Roseanna Robinson, director of Home Entertaining and Dining for The Pfaltzgraff Co. "We often intimidate guests by being too formal, yet some rules do apply." The following diagram shows a full-blown table setting for a fancy dinner party. Adjust it as necessary to fit your menu. "Remember to make your guests as comfortable as you can. Don't put out utensils that won't ever be used. If your menu doesn't include anything that would be eaten with a teaspoon, don't put teaspoons on the table. If you're planning to serve coffee and dessert afterward, bring out the teaspoons then," advises Robinson.
1. Napkin
2. Salad fork
3. Dinner fork
4. Dessert fork
5. Bread-and-butter plate, with spreader
6. Dinner plate
7. Dinner knife
8. Teaspoon
9. Teaspoon
10. Soup spoon
11. Cocktail fork
12. Water glass
13. Red-wine glass
14. White-wine glass
15. Coffee cup and saucer*
For an informal meal, include the coffee cup and saucer with the table setting. Otherwise, bring them to the table with the dessert.
www.almanac.com/food/settable.php
Etiquette Everyday ~ Entertaining
Table Setting Guides
Setting a table is not as difficult as it seems. The basic rule is: Utensils are placed in the order of use, that is, from the outside in. A second rule, with only a few exceptions is: forks go to the left of the plate, and knives and spoons go to the right.
Basic Place Setting > Description and diagram
For a basic table setting, here are two great tricks to help you – or your kids – remember the order of plates and utensils:
1. Picture the word “FORKS.” The order, left to right is: F for Fork, O for Plate (the shape!), K for Knives and S for Spoons. (Okay – you have to forget the r, but you get the idea!)
2. Holding your hands in front of you, touch the tips of your thumbs to the tips of your forefinergers to make a lower case ‘b’ with your left hand and a lower case ‘d’ with your right hand. This reminds you that ‘bread and butter’ go to the left of the place setting and ‘drinks’ go on the right. Emily Post could have used that trick – she was often confused about which bread and butter belonged to her—and sometimes she used her neighbor’s! In which case, when it was called to her attention, she would say to the dismayed lady or gentleman, “Oh, I am always mixing them up. Here, please take mine!”
3. Some other things to know:
o Knife blades always face the plate
o The napkin goes to the left of the fork, or on the plate
o The bread and butter plate and knife are optional
Informal Place Setting > Description and diagram
When an informal three-course dinner is served, the typical place setting includes these utensils and dishes:
Our illustration shows how a table would be set for the following menu: Soup course Salad or first course Entrée Dessert
a. Dinner plate: This is the ‘hub of the wheel’ and is usually the first thing to be set on the table. In our illustration, the dinner plate would be placed where the napkin is, with the napkin on top of the plate.
b. Two Forks: The forks are placed to the left of the plate. The dinner fork, the larger of the two forks, is used for the main course; the smaller fork is used for a salad or appetizer. The forks are arranged according to when you need to use them, following an ‘outside-in’ order. If the small fork is needed for an appetizer or a salad served before the main course, then it is placed on the left (outside) of the dinner fork; if the salad is served after the main course, then the small fork is placed to the right (inside) of the dinner fork, next to the plate.
c. Napkin: The napkin is folded or put in a napkin ring and placed either to the left of the forks or on the center of the dinner plate. Sometimes, a folded napkin is placed under the forks.
d. Dinner knife: The dinner knife is set immediately to the right of the plate, cutting edge facing inward. (If the main course is meat, a steak knife can take the place of the dinner knife.) At an informal meal, the dinner knife may be used for all courses, but a dirty knife should never be placed on the table, placemat or tablecloth.
e. Spoons: Spoons go to the right of the knife. In our illustration, soup is being served first, so the soupspoon goes to the far (outside) right of the dinner knife; the teaspoon or dessert spoon, which will be used last, goes to the left (inside) of the soupspoon, next to the dinner knife.
f. Glasses: Drinking glasses of any kind – water, wine, juice, ice tea – are placed at the top right of the dinner plate, above the knives and spoons.
Other dishes and utensils are optional, depending on what is being served, but may include:
g. Salad plate: This is placed to the left of the forks. If salad is to be eaten with the meal, you can forgo the salad plate and serve it directly on the dinner plate. However, if the entrée contains gravy or anything runny, it is better to serve the salad on a separate plate to keep things neater.
h. Bread plate with butter knife: If used, the bread plate goes above the forks, with the butter knife placed diagonally across the edge of plate, handle on the right side and blade facing down.
i. Dessert spoon and fork: These can be placed either horizontally above the dinner plate (the spoon on top with its handle facing to the right; the fork below with its handle facing left); or beside the plate. If placed beside the plate, the fork goes on the left side, closest to the plate (because it will be the last fork used) and the spoon goes on the right side of the plate, to the right of the dinner knife and to the left of the soupspoon.
j. Coffee cup and saucer: Our illustration shows a table setting that would be common in a restaurant serving a large number of people at once, with coffee being served during the meal. The coffee cup and saucer are placed above and to the right of the knife and spoons. At home, most people serve coffee after the meal. In that case the cups and saucers are brought to the table and placed above and to the right of the knife and spoons.
Formal Place Setting > Description and diagram
The one rule for a formal table is for everything to be geometrically spaced: the centerpiece at the exact center; the place settings at equal distances; and the utensils balanced. Beyond these placements, you can vary flower arrangements and decorations as you like.
The placement of utensils is guided by the menu, the idea being that you use utensils in an “outside in” order. For the illustrated place setting here, the order of the menu is:
Appetizer: Shellfish First Course: Soup or fruit Fish Course Entrée Salad
a. Service Plate: This large plate, also called a charger, serves as an underplate for the plate holding the first course, which will be brought to the table. When the first course is cleared, the service plate remains until the plate holding the entrée is served, at which point the two plates are exchanged. The charger may serve as the underplate for several courses which precede the entrée.
b. Butter plate: The small butter plate is placed above the forks at the left of the place setting.
c. Dinner fork: The largest of the forks, also called the place fork, it is placed on the left of the plate. Other smaller forks for other courses are arranged to the left or right of the dinner fork, according to when they will be used.
d. Fish fork: If there is a fish course, this small fork is placed farthest to the left of the dinner fork because it is the first fork used.
e. Salad fork: If salad is served after the entrée, the small salad fork is placed to the right of the dinner fork, next to the plate. If the salad is to be served first, and fish second, then the forks would be arranged (left to right): salad fork, fish fork, dinner fork.
f. Dinner knife: The large dinner knife is placed to the right of the dinner plate.
g. Fish knife: The specially shaped fish knife goes to the right of the dinner knife.
h. Salad knife: (Note: there is no salad knife in the illustration.) If used, according to the above menu, it would be placed to the left of the dinner fork, next to the dinner plate. If the salad is to be served first, and fish second, then the knives would be arranged (left to right):dinner knife, fish knife, salad knife.
i. Soup spoon or fruit spoon: If soup or fruit is served as a first course, then the accompanying spoon goes to the right of the knives.
j. Oyster fork: If shellfish are to be served, the oyster fork is set to the right of the spoons. Note: It is the only fork ever placed on the right of the plate.
k. Butter knife: This small spreader is paced diagonally on top of the butter plate, handle on the right and blade down.
l. Glasses: These can number up to five and are placed so that the smaller ones are in front. The water goblet (la) is placed directly above the knives. Just to the right goes a champagne flute (lb); In front of these are placed a red (lc) and/or white (ld) wine glass and a sherry glass (le)
m. Napkin: The napkin is placed on top of the charger (if one is used) or in the space for the plate.
In general:
Knife blades are always placed with the cutting edge toward the plate.
No more than three of any implement is ever placed on the table, except when an oyster fork is used in addition to three other forks. If more than three courses are served before dessert, then the utensil for the fourth course is brought in with the food; likewise the salad fork and knife may be brought in when the salad course is served.
Dessert spoons and forks are brought in on the dessert plate just before dessert is served.
Dining and Table Manner Basics
Spaghetti Eating
You don't have to use the spoon. The spoon is there to help you wind the pasta onto your fork. Twirl the pasta with a fork either by rolling it around in the spoon or just use the fork alone, keeping the fork tip in contact with the plate.You wouldn't think that there would be a controversy about how to eat spaghetti. But, some are of the opinion that a spoon should not used and using a spoon is frowned upon in Italy. Some also feel that cutting spaghetti into small bite-sized pieces is not proper. However, it should be fine to cut the strands to shorten slightly before twirling.Slurping pasta is the only method that is never proper.The following links have opinions by others: www.deliciousitaly.com and http://www.fineliving.com/
Passing Dishes
When asked to pass a dish of food, it's okay to help yourself to some. While helping yourself, say something like, "I'll help myself to some now so that you won't have to pass it back to me". But, if there's not much left, then don't take the last helping; pass it to the person who requested the dish. Food dishes are passed from left to right (counterclockwise).
All About Napkins
If it was a large napkin, then it should be left folded in half. A small luncheon napkin can be fully opened.If eating properly, food should not be dropping onto one's lap. Napkins are really meant to dab crumbs or food from your mouth.
When leaving the table mid-meal, or between courses, place your napkin on the LEFT side of your plate, not on the chair. The waiter would only take your plate away if it looked like you had eaten all your meal, not because you were absent from the table for a moment.
Napkin rings are not necessary, but are fun ways to dress up a table. There are dozens of ways to display napkins, and it's a matter of personal taste. Napkins can go next to the plate, on the plate, or in a glass. Formal place settings often have the napkin folded to the left of the forks or on the plate.To see examples of many different ways to fold napkins and where to display them, see http://www.serviettes.info/
If you were in a very formal restaurant where waiters are hovering nearby to tend to your every need, then let the waiter pick up the napkin for you. However, if the napkin was within arm's reach and you didn't have to get up to get it, then simply reach down and pick it up.
When finished dining, place the napkin neatly on the table, to the right side of the plate. Do not refold the napkin, but don't leave it crumpled up either.
Napkin etiquette experts say food taken out of the mouth should come out the way it went in. If you used a fork, then gently spit the food back onto the fork. If it's really chewed up and gross, then if you have a tissue, use that to spit into. If you need to get out a piece of fish bone, use your fingers. Napkins are supposed to be used to dab the corners of the mouth, never use it to blow one's nose (which should be done in the restroom). Also, never use it to wipe your face.
Although commonly seen in restaurants, applying lipstick at the dinner table is not proper etiquette. But, if you did it discretely, and took just a few seconds, then no harm was done. It's best that lipstick, face powder, blowing one's nose, teeth picking, or hair fussing should be performed in the privacy of a restroom.
Gristle is also deposited back onto the fork and placed at the edge of the plate. Done discretely, no one will notice the gristle removal nor the location of its deposit. Any food removed from the mouth is taken out the same way it was put in.
Chewing anything with the mouth open is not proper etiquette whether at the dinner table or not. Therefore, talking with something in one's mouth is not proper either.
When appetizers are served, everyone should have their own small plate on which to place any dip, chips, crackers, cheese, nuts, etc. That should take care of any double-dipping.
In a very formal restaurant, let the waiter pick it up for you. If it has fallen under the table and the waiter doesn't see it, let him know that you need another utensil. Otherwise, if it's within arm's reach, go ahead and pick it up and place it on the table away from your place settings. Let your waiter know that the utensil had fallen on the floor and that you need a clean one.
Lobster Eating
Unfortunately, eating lobster is messy, and there isn’t a nice and tidy way to crack the shells and remove the meat. In a restaurant, a bib will be provided when having lobster in order to protect your clothing because there will be inadvertent squirting when cracking.
There are two schools of thought about eating lobster. One is to eat the lobster meat immediately after cracking open each piece and the other is to wait until all the meat has been taken out of every piece and laid onto the plate.
If you want to gracefully eat lobster, then the latter is preferred. To elegantly dine on lobster in a nice restaurant, first remove all the meat, clean hands, and use a fork to dip each piece in the butter. For large lobster pieces, cut with a knife as you normally would cut meat. The process of cracking the lobster and removing meat does not take that long, probably about 5 minutes.
Typically, the lobster is cracked in the following order:
1. Claws: twist off the claws, crack the shell with the claw cracker, and remove the meat with the seafood fork. Discard the empty shells in the bowl provided.
2. Flippers: twist the lobster tail from the body. Break off the tail flippers, remove meat, and discard the flippers.
3. Lobster tail: insert a fork into the small end where the flippers had been and push the meat out through the large end. Discard the empty shell.
4. Small legs on body (Optional): if you plan to suck the meat out of the small legs, then break off each leg and place them on your plate. If you do not plan to eat the meat, then leave the legs on and discard with the body. Some prefer to skip the small legs in a restaurant as there is not much meat.
5. Tomalley: in the body, the mushy greenish-gray liver/pancreas should be discarded. Some consider it a delicacy; however, the liver accumulates dioxins and other environmental toxins and pollutants and may not be safe.
6. Roe: if you have a female lobster, you might see red roe or eggs which are considered a delicacy and can be eaten.
Spaghetti Eating
You don't have to use the spoon. The spoon is there to help you wind the pasta onto your fork. Twirl the pasta with a fork either by rolling it around in the spoon or just use the fork alone, keeping the fork tip in contact with the plate.You wouldn't think that there would be a controversy about how to eat spaghetti. But, some are of the opinion that a spoon should not used and using a spoon is frowned upon in Italy. Some also feel that cutting spaghetti into small bite-sized pieces is not proper. However, it should be fine to cut the strands to shorten slightly before twirling.Slurping pasta is the only method that is never proper.The following links have opinions by others: www.deliciousitaly.com and http://www.fineliving.com/
Passing Dishes
When asked to pass a dish of food, it's okay to help yourself to some. While helping yourself, say something like, "I'll help myself to some now so that you won't have to pass it back to me". But, if there's not much left, then don't take the last helping; pass it to the person who requested the dish. Food dishes are passed from left to right (counterclockwise).
All About Napkins
If it was a large napkin, then it should be left folded in half. A small luncheon napkin can be fully opened.If eating properly, food should not be dropping onto one's lap. Napkins are really meant to dab crumbs or food from your mouth.
When leaving the table mid-meal, or between courses, place your napkin on the LEFT side of your plate, not on the chair. The waiter would only take your plate away if it looked like you had eaten all your meal, not because you were absent from the table for a moment.
Napkin rings are not necessary, but are fun ways to dress up a table. There are dozens of ways to display napkins, and it's a matter of personal taste. Napkins can go next to the plate, on the plate, or in a glass. Formal place settings often have the napkin folded to the left of the forks or on the plate.To see examples of many different ways to fold napkins and where to display them, see http://www.serviettes.info/
If you were in a very formal restaurant where waiters are hovering nearby to tend to your every need, then let the waiter pick up the napkin for you. However, if the napkin was within arm's reach and you didn't have to get up to get it, then simply reach down and pick it up.
When finished dining, place the napkin neatly on the table, to the right side of the plate. Do not refold the napkin, but don't leave it crumpled up either.
Napkin etiquette experts say food taken out of the mouth should come out the way it went in. If you used a fork, then gently spit the food back onto the fork. If it's really chewed up and gross, then if you have a tissue, use that to spit into. If you need to get out a piece of fish bone, use your fingers. Napkins are supposed to be used to dab the corners of the mouth, never use it to blow one's nose (which should be done in the restroom). Also, never use it to wipe your face.
Although commonly seen in restaurants, applying lipstick at the dinner table is not proper etiquette. But, if you did it discretely, and took just a few seconds, then no harm was done. It's best that lipstick, face powder, blowing one's nose, teeth picking, or hair fussing should be performed in the privacy of a restroom.
Gristle is also deposited back onto the fork and placed at the edge of the plate. Done discretely, no one will notice the gristle removal nor the location of its deposit. Any food removed from the mouth is taken out the same way it was put in.
Chewing anything with the mouth open is not proper etiquette whether at the dinner table or not. Therefore, talking with something in one's mouth is not proper either.
When appetizers are served, everyone should have their own small plate on which to place any dip, chips, crackers, cheese, nuts, etc. That should take care of any double-dipping.
In a very formal restaurant, let the waiter pick it up for you. If it has fallen under the table and the waiter doesn't see it, let him know that you need another utensil. Otherwise, if it's within arm's reach, go ahead and pick it up and place it on the table away from your place settings. Let your waiter know that the utensil had fallen on the floor and that you need a clean one.
Lobster Eating
Unfortunately, eating lobster is messy, and there isn’t a nice and tidy way to crack the shells and remove the meat. In a restaurant, a bib will be provided when having lobster in order to protect your clothing because there will be inadvertent squirting when cracking.
There are two schools of thought about eating lobster. One is to eat the lobster meat immediately after cracking open each piece and the other is to wait until all the meat has been taken out of every piece and laid onto the plate.
If you want to gracefully eat lobster, then the latter is preferred. To elegantly dine on lobster in a nice restaurant, first remove all the meat, clean hands, and use a fork to dip each piece in the butter. For large lobster pieces, cut with a knife as you normally would cut meat. The process of cracking the lobster and removing meat does not take that long, probably about 5 minutes.
Typically, the lobster is cracked in the following order:
1. Claws: twist off the claws, crack the shell with the claw cracker, and remove the meat with the seafood fork. Discard the empty shells in the bowl provided.
2. Flippers: twist the lobster tail from the body. Break off the tail flippers, remove meat, and discard the flippers.
3. Lobster tail: insert a fork into the small end where the flippers had been and push the meat out through the large end. Discard the empty shell.
4. Small legs on body (Optional): if you plan to suck the meat out of the small legs, then break off each leg and place them on your plate. If you do not plan to eat the meat, then leave the legs on and discard with the body. Some prefer to skip the small legs in a restaurant as there is not much meat.
5. Tomalley: in the body, the mushy greenish-gray liver/pancreas should be discarded. Some consider it a delicacy; however, the liver accumulates dioxins and other environmental toxins and pollutants and may not be safe.
6. Roe: if you have a female lobster, you might see red roe or eggs which are considered a delicacy and can be eaten.
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